Five Things to Help When You're Feeling Blue

I'm mot usually a list writer, but I've been thinking lately about some of the things that help to improve my mood when I'm in a slump and I thought I'd share. Of course, these aren't substitutes for getting medical help or counseling if you're struggling with something serious. These are just some helpful tips/reminders to help with the blues-y kinds of feelings that we all get from time to time.

1. Drink a cup of tea. There's something soothing about the process of boiling water, selecting a tea bag, and sitting for a few moments to enjoy the comfort of a warm beverage. It also gets you up and doing something when you might be tempted to sleep or mope around. I've become a rather avid tea drinker lately, which is probably a sign of my melancholy tendendies and an attempt to curb my ice cream cravings. =) Tea just has all kinds of benefits!

2. Do some simple form of exercise like body weight squats or planks. I've been setting a timer and trying to slowly increase how long I can plank. I've been doing the same thing with chin-up hangs. I can't do an actual chin-up yet, but I do static hangs with a chin-up bar that I attach to our bathroom doorway. If I'm feeling a little blah, moving around and getting my heart rate up helps to pull me out of my funk a bit and also gives me the satisfaction of knowing that I'm taking control of my life and my health, even if it's just in a small way. Of course, if you're at work or out in public it might no be possible to do chin-up hangs and would probably be little awkward to drop down on the ground and plank, but there have been quite a few times that I've done squats in the bathroom or other unoccupied room at work. It can be done!

3. Take a walk or sit outside. Vitamin D. We need more of it. Sometimes I'll walk around outside during my lunch break or sit and read on a big rock that's outside my building. It's refreshing and helps to clear my head.

4. Do a Random (or not so random) Act of Kindness. Write a note of encouragement to someone you know could use it. Drop an anonymous gift on someone's porch (it doesn't have to be expensive--$5 Starbucks gift card, box of tea, some cookies or muffins, etc.). Give a compliment or strike up conversation with a stranger. It will get you outside of yourself and bring you joy to know you've brightened someone's day!

5. Unplug from social media and journal or read instead. You'll be less likely to spiral into further blah-ness if you're not exposing yourself to a constant stream of information and photos to potentially spark feelings of comparison and envy. Save social media for when your're in better spirits, and instead write about what's already in your mind or escape into the world of a good book (some escapism can be healthy in moderation). The creativity that can be sparked through writing or expanding your mind through reading can really be energizing and uplifting.

None of these things will necessarily banish your blues, but I think they can offer some steps in a more positive direction.

What else would you add to the list?

Val

I stopped by my parent’s house today and on the way to the door grabbed the mail from the mailbox. Amid the junk mail, I noticed a personally addressed note from a long-time friend of the family, Val Ham. I mentioned the note to my mom, which prompted her to update me with the news that Val has cancer—of the terminal variety. She couldn’t hold back the tears as she talked about her beloved friend, the friend who has called her every day on her birthday for thirty-something years. The friend who faithfully stood with her in prayer through my dad’s deep, seven-year-long depression. The friend who, on into her seventies has poured time, money, and prayer into a little Eastern-European country called Moldovoa (the poorest country in Europe), going on regular trips to offer medical care, lead Bible studies, and always filling her suitcases with items to bless those in poverty.

I went on one such trip with Val in 2005. Her energy and enthusiasm for serving others and telling them about Jesus have left an indelible impression upon me. I spent a couple days with her in Maryland, where she lived at the time, and was able to observe how she lived. On one of the days, we were shopping for supplies for the trip and she was adamant about finding the best deals for everything. “So we can have more to buy things for the Moldovans,” she said. I learned something valuable about money that day—that it is a powerful tool for good in the hands of the right person, and that with each purchase, we demonstrate where our priorities lie. For her, it was (and is) helping others and telling them about the love of her Savior.

Val most likely will not make the headlines before she breathes her last. While people are amazed at Lady Gaga’s Oscars performance and other stars fade in and out of the limelight, she’ll quietly, but boldly live the remainder of her days faithfully following Jesus. But I know that there’s One who takes notice and who has noticed all along, and I’m confident that when they first meet face to face he’ll say something like “Well done, my good and faithful servant. Enter into the joy of your Lord.”

As my own brief life stretches before me with the unknown number of days it will total, I think about this awesome responsibility of stewarding a life—one life. What does it look like to do it well? As I piece together my mental collage of inspiration--of people who embody a life well-lived, it's Val and others like her who are front and center. Some are still living, these unassuming saints, who teach me more in their struggles than any celebrity--Christian or otherwise--ever could. Others have gone on to be with the Lord, but their words and actions remain etched in my mind and heart, giving me courage to press on and hold fast to Christ.

In the note to my mom, Val  closed with the words, "With the chaos around us[of cancer, chemo, and her husband's own serious health issues], pray that we can be a witness for Christ." Enclosed was a support check for the ministry my dad leads.

Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God. Hebrews 12:1-2

Using Your Gifts

I remember a conversation Geoff and I had some time before we were married as we drove back from the beach. We got on the topic of gifts and talents and using them well and I remember saying something like, “No one ever told when I was growing up how important this is. No one ever told me to develop my gifts in light of the fact that life is short and I only have so long to use what God has given me for good in this world.”  That’s not entirely true. My mom did encourage me to write. But, I think somewhere along the way I missed the idea that I’m actually a steward of whatever gifts I possess. They aren’t mine to hoard or to hide or to hinder. I don’t have the right to say, “That’s not my gift” when everyone around me is affirming that it is. 

Now, I’m getting all up in my own business with this post because I am greatly skilled in denial when it comes to my gifts. I can clearly see where you’re gifted, but it gets a little foggy when the gaze is turned inward. And let’s be honest—I’m also lazy. I am expert at avoiding what I know I should be doing. I like the cozy womb of my apathy. Being born and crying and breathing and growing is scary business. But the paradox is that denial and apathy and fear really don’t feel all that great. The place where we use our gifts is actually where we come most alive. New parents wait in anticipation to hear their baby’s first cry because it’s a sign of life. Our own figurative (or even literal) crying and straining in discerning and using our gifts is a sign of life and growth in us, and is ultimately life-giving for others.

Though our gifts are a deep part of who we are, it’s almost as if they are simultaneously outside of us—these facets of our personalities that need to be looked at objectively as commodities for good in the world. Or put another way, our gifts are not us. Therefore, we neither ought to feel overly attached or arrogant as their stewards, nor should we be in denial of their existence in false humility. They are what they are and it’s up to us to hone them and use them.

At a women’s conference I attended a couple weekends ago Bob Goff, author of Love Does, said in an interview that we should ask ourselves “What am I gifted at that will last?” Our time is limited, so we shouldn't spend it trying to do everything. Ultimately, he said people are what will last, so I think the takeaway is that what we choose to invest in should somehow be for the good of others. And I think asking ourselves this question can help streamline our lives. A friend who is involved in a non-profit organization told me that in a recent meeting they evaluated their activities based on their mission statement. They realized that some things they were doing needed to go because they didn't actually line up with the mission statement. They were good things, but didn't fit with their specific goals. I think we could benefit from seeing our gifts this way. We will be more effective doing a few things well and focusing our energies upon what we are naturally gifted in and passionate about than if we are exhausting ourselves by trying to live out of what we might wish we were good at. This also means that we will probably need to practice what we are good at in order to become better at it. Part of being a steward is not just doing something with what you have, but honing and developing it in order to maximize its potential.

So, what are you good at? If you're not sure, what do others say you are good at? What do you get compliments about? What excites you? And finally, what will last? How can you use what you have been entrusted with in a way that will outlive your life? It may not be big in the eyes of  the world. Maybe one of your gifst is being able to listen well to others. Make sure you're around people enough to be in a place to listen. Maybe you're moved with compassion by the suffering of the poor and the needs of the world overwhelm you. Don't be paralyzed by the magnitude of it all--let your compassion move you to action even in small ways--write encouraging notes, visit an elderly neighbor, sponsor a child, help out with a homeless ministry. Are you skilled with music, writing, speaking, or teaching? Are you good with numbers? Are you a  natural leader, planner, or organizer? Whatever your gifts may be, find an outlet and let others benefit from them.The world needs what you have to offer.