Thoughts on Gratitude...Again

Gratitude is hard work. It seems crazy that I even have to type those words. After all, I live in a part of the world where most of my problems could rightly be labeled “first world problems” (that phrase almost looks weird because I’m so used to seeing it as #firstworldproblems, which in and of itself helps prove the point). I have so much compared to so many. And yet it is so ridiculously hard to please me. Or for me to stay content.

I go through bouts where it comes a bit more naturally, where staying in a place of gratitude comes with more ease. But always I come back to a place of having to fight for it and work at it. Where it gets ugly and I become so tired of my own attitude that I am desperate to begin cultivating gratitude once again. Believe me, it’s not some super-holy desire to be obedient that often gets me here. I can’t live well in perpetual negativity. I don’t think any of us can. 

And maybe that’s why we’re admonished all throughout Scripture to give thanks. I think we can read those admonitions and sometimes feel once again like a little child who is being told to thank Aunt Susie for the birthday gift we may not have wanted in the first place. They can feel like distant, sterile reminders to “mind your manners.” But while minding our manners is important for certain social contexts, a heart of gratitude can transform our lives. Cultivating real gratitude is probably more like eating our vegetables and exercising than it is mere-manner minding. It's actually really good for us.

Giving thanks isn’t just something nice or proper to do. It’s good for our communities and necessary for our souls. And it’s not just something to do. I think it’s a way of being. It’s having a character shaped by trust in the goodness of God. But the being must be ushered in by the doing. And the doing doesn't have an end point--not in this life at least--and I can't fathom an eternity without thanks. But it doesn't matter what I can't fathom; this is what John heard and saw as he glimpsed Heaven:

"And all the angels were standing around the throne and around the elders and the four living creatures, and they fell on their faces before the throne and worshiped God,
saying, “Amen! Blessing and glory and wisdom and thanksgiving and honor and power and might be to our God forever and ever! Amen.”

And in another place it says they are saying "Worthy is the Lamb who was slain."

Jesus. The Lamb who was slain (and was raised) for me. For you. That certainly puts all my grumbling into perspective. On my worst day I have a living Savior who loves me and gave himself for me so that I can live the life I was meant to live and be the person I was meant to be--all for his glory.

And this is the part where I say something like, "Woe is me! For I am a woman of unclean lips..."

So I begin again. After a week of failing, thankful that His mercies are new every morning.